Turning 70 is like turning 21 in celsius.You encouraged them to consume vegetables and milk.In your 70’s, if you are looked down upon by your kids and grandkids, that is your fault.The older she gets, the more interested he becomes in her.An archaeologist is the perfect husband for a woman.For example, large print crossword puzzles.At 70, you become more appreciative of “the big things in life.”.“You did it, you made it to the bathroom!” they say.When you reach your seventies, you start getting congratulated again for not having to wear diapers.And that, my friend, is the sad definition of ‘OLD’!.I turned to her and asked, “Are you getting a caterer?”.A few days ago, I quietly told my best friend that I was having an affair.These days, about half the stuff in my shopping cart says: “For fast relief.”.Firstly, she wanted to be cremated, and secondly, Wal-Mart was to be her final resting place.As a result of preparing her will, the elderly woman informed her preacher of two final requests.They go to the Lakeview restaurant for their 80th birthday because they have never been there.They celebrate their 70th birthday at the Lakeview restaurant because it is wheelchair accessible.Their 60th birthday will be spent at the Lakeview restaurant because it’s quiet and offers a nice view.For their 50th birthdays, they go to Lakeview restaurant because the prices are reasonable and the wine list is good.They go to Lakeview restaurant for their 40th birthday because the waiters are cute and wear tight pants.Three women share a birthday and celebrate it together.The master found nothing inside the box when he opened it.A student of the zen master gave him a large box with a ribbon around it for his 70th birthday.And the man replies, “but you haven’t used the one I gave you last year.”.When she turns 71, she asks, “Why haven’t you given me a gift?”.A man gave his wife a coffin for her 70th birthday. Not only will you get a good laugh, but you will also be able to get a good laugh at yourself for not understanding it at first. This blog is a compilation of turning 70 jokes from across the country. They have a different outlook on life and some of their jokes are something you would have to get older to understand. For a long time, senior citizens have been known to be some of the funniest people around.
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